Friday, July 16, 2010

Good Things and Good Times Ahead...

Things are turning toward better times for me, I can feel it in all I am doing lately. Having made the conscious discovery that I am holding onto old memories and old hopes and that that kind of holding on is just holding me back from the future and the happiness I deserve and will have. Having these things brought to my attention and beginning to deal with the letting go, I am feeling lighter and more myself again every day. Getting rid of items in my life that are connected with the past; with emotional ties and memories has been very good for me. As I have let each piece go I have felt freer and more hopeful for the future. I wish I had done this months ago. But I guess it's better to be a little late, than to never arrive!

And as I open up, good things are starting to happen. I think this is because I am making the room for these good things, and I have belief that things will change and that I deserve these good happenings. Like yesterday, I took a little box of old coins I had saved over the years and went to the coin guy in town, thinking maybe he'd buy them off me and I'd get a hundred bucks or so. I didn' thave any real need for the coins, or any attachment to them, they were just sitting in a cardboard box in my storage - and previous to that stuffed under the bed! I was thoroughly delighted when he took what he wanted from the box and gave me $502.00 in cash! I was so ready for something good to happen, and I was open to it, but not expecting such a great windfall! The universe is opening up to me once again, and allowing me to be happy. I am so grateful.

Another good thing that happened this week, my friend, Pink, had her cancer surgery and they believe they got all of the tumors (7 of them) blasted to smithereens with the laser. So hopefully she will go through follow up now and be declared cancer free! I was so pleased that the surgery went well and that she was back home that night resting comfortably. She's been such an encouragement and an inspiration to me during my own rough spots. And she has such faith that she can beat this; those positive thoughts are working for her - and me too!

Even my energy and enthusiasm levels have been up this week as a result I believe of making conscious decisions to let go of the shit that bugs me and keeps me from being happy, and embracing more of the stuff that I love to do, and that makes me happy - including the people in my life. I've been interacting more with my friends and family, enjoying their company and having some great conversations. I realized I was spending too much time alone and isolating myself too much, so I changed this and it's been a wonderful change.

I think it's just amazing how the human mind and thought process works. If one focuses on what they do not have in their lives and how unhappy they are without that, then, yes, they are unhappy and feel that loss. But you can make changes, only you can make those changes in yourself, and you can decide to stop focusing on the negative and shift your focus to the positive. It doesn't happen over night, but it can happen as quickly as you allow it to happen. It definitely took me a week of "thinking" about the changes I wanted to make and see in my life, before I started to actively implement my plan and start doing what I needed to do to see those changes start to work.

I know with me personally, I had to move past thinking about my recent ex-girlfriend and how much I was missing her in my life. That was hard, but I am doing it. I am doing it because I finally looked at what I was doing to myself; how I was making my own life harder by holding on to her memories and wishing for something that just could not be any longer. Once I realized what I was doing to myself, it became easy to say to myself, I don't want to feel like this anymore, I don't deserve to be made to feel badly, it just didn't work out, and it's not my fault. Yes, once I let it go, I have been so much lighter at heart and so much happier in my soul. It's a good life, yes indeed!

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